Dana Scully’s ability to get hungry while performing an autopsy is the stuff of legend. In fact, she almost always finds herself craving whatever the victim’s last meal was! I like to think it’s because her work reminds her that life is fleeting, so—since she usually eats so healthy— she should order that bucket of fried chicken while she can. This combination of the macabre and the silly made me want to create an entrée that pays tribute to Scully’s autopsy munchies.

This homemade pizza with easy, from-scratch sauce is prepared just like the one she orders after an autopsy in S5E12: thin crust and rich tomato sauce, with the same toppings her autopsy subject ate (green peppers, pepperoni, and mushrooms). I found the recipe for the sauce here. Sliced tomatoes are also clearly visible on the pizza in the episode, so I added them to mine for authenticity. I’ll admit, I was a little skeptical of putting pepperoni where my mind tells me there should be sausage, but the final results were FANTASTIC: the spice of the pepperoni combines well with the crisp crunch of the green pepper, and the mushroom mellows them out. I wasn’t sure I’d like tomato slices either, but they might be my new favorite pizza topping!

P.S. Wondering why I’m doing a TV menu and not a book menu this month? All the answers can be found here.

 

Scully’s Pizza

“Stomach contents show last meal close to the time of death consisting of…pizza. Topped with pepperoni, green peppers, mushrooms…mushrooms…that sounds REALLY good.”
— X-Files

INGREDIENTS:

• FOR THE CRUST AND TOPPINGS (the pizza in the picture has fewer toppings so that each topping is easily identifiable at a glance, but I ultimately think it tastes better with the amounts of each ingredient provided here):
  • 1 serving of pizza dough (I used a Pillsbury pizza crust, but to each their own)
  • approx. 1 cup mozzarella, depending on how cheesy you like your pizza
  • 1/2 a green pepper
  • 1/4 cup sliced mini bella mushrooms
  • a handful of pepperoni
  • 1/2 a Roma tomato (optional)
• FOR THE SAUCE:
  
  • 6 tbsp tomato paste
  • 2 tbsp olive oil
  • 1 tsp garlic powder
  • 1 tsp onion powder
  • 2 tsp dried oregano
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt
  • 1 1/2 tsp maple syrup
  • 2 tbsp red cooking wine
  • 1/4 cup water

Makes 1 pizza

INSTRUCTIONS:

1. Preheat your oven to the time indicated on your pizza dough instructions (mine was 425°).
2. Combine all your sauce ingredients together in a saucepan and whisk until combined. Heat on low for 5-10 minutes or until it begins to bubble sluggishly. Give it a brief whisk every few minutes while it heats, to keep the oil and tomato paste from separating.
   
3. While you wait for your sauce, work your dough into shape. Mine came in a rectangle shape, but I wanted to make it circular to match the pizza in the show. So I wadded the dough up into a ball and rolled it out a few times on each side on a floured surface. I greased a baking sheet and gently placed the dough in the middle of the sheet. Then I stretched it several times by pushing outward with the tips of my fingers, starting at the center and working my way out to the edge of the crust, gradually pushing every part of the dough. It wanted to spring back at first, but eventually it kept a nice round shape.
4. Slice your green pepper into strips and your tomato into thin, 1/4″ thick medallions.
   
5. When the sauce is ready, spread half of it on your pizza. Sprinkle on your cheese, then add your toppings. Store the rest of the sauce in the fridge to use on future pizzas.
   
   

   

   

6. Bake the pizza on the baking sheet for the amount of time indicated on your dough packaging (I baked mine for about 18 minutes).
   
7. Slice and serve warm after a long day of autopsies.